im juz a jealous guy....

anybody noes the john lennon song, jealous guy??
i tink im like tat..
but it's sumthing i cun help it..
im not the richest guy, im not mr universe neither am i manhunt material..
insecurity would set in..
but guess tats where my ego comes in to leave my esteem up...

but one thing is for sure...
the longer we're together, the lesser this jealousy is...
cos i trust u more wif everyday...
i really hope we wun haf such misunderstanding again...

last nite was the first time i couldnt laff nor smile nor even slp by my own accord...
that 70s show never failed to make me laff..
but they din...
was juz lying on my bed, blanket to my neck...
and juz staring at the tv screen tinking of sumthin else..
or sumone in particular...
i tried to slp by my own..
but i cun..
lethargicness, fatigue took me away...
juz slept wif the tv on..
till morn...

anyway juz wanna say im sorry...
feel damn bad for hurting u...
it pricks in my heart...
but u shld always noe this...
i love u, always........

more to come...

hehe..
yest was our first month anniversary..
kinda fast, a mth juz pass by..
but this mth was the happiest mth i could ever haf...
whenever im wif her, i would smile, laff non stop..
it's like an effect she has on me..
like how i cun get angry wif her..
=P
rite now, my only wish is to haf us like this for many more months, yrs to come...
-grinz-

we din do much yest..
maybe cos we had done quite a bit on xmas itself..
and of course, my wallet is a lil drained..
prepared a bouquet of yellow roses, her fav, and left it in my bike box...
i knew she would always wanna rush to open the box, hence the ploy..
hehe~
she's a person who tends to not show wats she's feeling but i guess she was grinning wif glee in her heart..
=)

it was her fren's bdae tat day, so we gotta attend a bbq at pasir ris park..
nuthing much there except eating and of course the traditional stroll by the beach...
had a nice tok wif her by the breakwater...
feeling the breeze...
listening to the waves..
ahhhhh....
=P
hehe~
a very calming effect..

brought her to changi V for nasi lemak..
and her obsession wif aquas...
haha~
din get to see any at all..
maybe they got raided or wat..
disappoinment..

brought her back to the place we got together..
watched wif her a movie of the same genre...
and coincidentally, i parked my bike at the very same lot and same level i did on that very day a mth ago..
hehe~
fate's on my side i guess...

she's someone i'll cherish n treasure..
wouldnt wanna let her go..
cos wat i see in her is wat i had never seen b4...
and tats the truth from the bottom of my heart...
i swear....
=)

hohoho~

wat xmas it had been..
everything went as planned..
thank god for that..
especially the hard part of getting the tix..
=P

brought her to my house as per the previous entry..
left her in my rm to watch a horror movie, sumthing she dreads but loves to watch...
=P
got down to work in the kitchen...
did the pasta, and the frying of ingredients..
an poured the cream in to make the soup base for the pasta..
n tat was the easy part..
cos next came the baked ham...
haf really no idea how it's gonna turn out...
spread the honey, added sum spice stick(dunno wat it's called)..
and push into the oven for baking..
hm...
the color of it was a lil burnt..
but i guess it tasted alrite?
yes dear??
-grin-

wif a candle lit up, white tablecloth on a piece of wooden foldable table and tada~
our romantic dinner in my room...
=)
better than a restaurant, or so i say....
great dinner, wif great companion and of course great chef~
=P

went to catch sound of colours at lido..
it was packed in town..
wonder wat are they doing there...
dun they noe im coming..
hehe~
it was a nice show...
for the day itself..

we went back to my house for the unwrapping of presents..
cos i told her tat she COULDNT open it b4 xmas..
hehe~
she knew wat i was givin her, tat killed the surprise..
but guess she was touched nonetheless...
im so happy if mine..
hehe~
cos my wallet was torn in all places so she bought me a new one..
it smells nice i muz say...
her scent probably...
=P

this gotta be the best xmas ive ever had...
as long as she likes it, i'll do this anyday, anytime, all my life...
=)

merry xmas to all, and to all a gd day...

everything's prepared..
awaiting her arrival..
on my chariot of course..
hehe~
i hope wat i planned goes smoothly...
especially the food part..
shldnt be much of a prob i guess..
anyway it's the first time im cooking for a gal..
hehe~
*blush*
=P

gotta turn down tons of dates juz for a nite wif juz the 2 of us..
hope u guys understand..
=)

im all set and ready to go to fetch my beloved princess frm castle yishun..
lets hope this day would goes down into the record book as the best xmas of my 20 yrs of life..
keke~

cya guys..
and one last thing..
merry xmas..
enjoy it wif ur loved one..
=)

deep shit...

the level of shit im in now cun be measured in terms man..
it's even deeper than 30,000 leagues...
y is this shit happening to me..
look at the time..
i noe im dumb to stay up so late but it needed me..
but in the end, sigh...
all i hope is tat the morn would be a better time..
let me find "u"...
pls...
god, help me...
santa, all i wan for xmas is that..
ive been a good boy..
yes i was...
-grin-
=)

double-edged sword..

i noe how it feels to be on the end of a double edged sword...
hurting her is like hurting myself..
my heart aches while she's aching as well..
is this love or juz me being a fool..
i tink it's the former..
dun wanna see her in tat state..
but the blame's on me..
me and my mouth wif those dumb stuff...
in the end i myself feels the pain..
really feel damn bad...
apologies on my side..
-smile-

xmas is damn near..
i feel kinda guilty..
din manage to get presents for my closer frens like i did last yr..
but im broke...
forgive me..
i was workign last yr and was in the land of the cheap..
hehe~
=P
anyway juz now tat it's the tot of giving tat counts..
-grin-

she still doesn't noe wat im doing for her..
and tats gd..
dun wanna it to be revealed den the fun is gone...
i still haven got my xmas tree yet though..
juz cun find the perfect size..
guess i gotta wait till next yr den...

i hope the guy above gives me the strength n will to do wat i need to do..
hehe~
"he" noes wat im trying to say..
to the rest, u need not noe..
keke~

an advance merry xmas to all~
juz in case im not blogging in the comign days~
enjoy this wonderful day wif ur loved ones and tell them how u love them..
treasure them like how im cherishing n treasuring her...
-grin-
=)

at home...

yep at home, but not mine...
hehe~
no prizes for guessing it rite..
=P

anyway the reason y i aint in sch now is cos i was the delivery man for the morn..
sent breakfast to her house in the morn..
so i skipped the entire morn in sch n spent it at her place..

was eating at the dining table..
juz the 2 of us..
it made haf the sort of feeling that we were act in OUR house and all married n sorts..
such a blissful and happy feeling..
like how she's feeding me M&Ms now...
hehe~

it really makes me wonder at times y guys juz hate to get married..
for me, i cun wait till the day i wed..
cos i find tat im gonna be the best husband i can be to my wife..
n fulfill my duties of course...
hm..
would she be my wife?
tats far too early to tell..
-grin-

shld i go back to sch n rot?
or shld i juz stay at her place n rot..
i guess i cun choose the latter...
tat leaves me wif no choice..
sigh~

juz wanna leave this note for a gd fren of mine...
to those who dun understand, dun ask and try to understand...
hey, need anything call me, u noe hu u are....
msg me or call me when u read this..
got sumthing impt to tell ya..
and dun worry...
rem our pact?
i'll try to fulfill my end this time round..
=)

tats abt it..
shall type more when i haf more things to say..
especially abt *ahem*
:)

shock, glee, touched...

the above 3 feelings were felt in that particular manner...
cos of sumthing sumone did..
hehe~
=)

act it all started wif me daring her to come on down to sch frm her work place..
wif me doubting her to even tink of tat...
but how was i wrong...
rite after we put down the phone, she came on down to sch...
in the rain, by cab...

she juz gave me a call wif an ultimatum to reach mac or else....
and tat prompted me to run all the way down there..
arousing curious stares frm everyone walking along the aisle..
=P

but upon reaching there, i coldnt see her..
so i tot she was pulling my leg..
but in fact, she was hidden by a pillar..
the sight of her was a shock to me..
followed by a smile slowly revealing on my face..
and a warm fuzzy feeling felt by my heart...
really made my lousy, wet day brighten up...
juz by looking into that slit eyes of hers...
=)

i've always wondered how shaunie would feel when charis always surprises him...
n finally i'd knew it...
nuthing but happiness n of course love..
hehe~
=)

'tis the season to be jolly....

yep, xmas is arnd the corner...
anybody excited? jubilated? anticipated?
me personally, love this time of the yr..
cos this is the time when no matter wat, everyone would feel jolly folly for no gd reason..
or maybe juz me..
but i haf tons of reasons to be jolly folly and all cuddly~
haha~

maybe it's juz me but i love to hand out presents during xmas..
it juz gives me a sense of satisfaction i guess...
even tho i dun receive anything in return...
=)
i got a weird theory to y im so absorbed wif xmas...
cos my bdae happens to fall within the 12 days of xmas..
though it's the 2nd last day..
it still does..
hehe~
=P

but as age catches up wif me, i find that my xmas presents frm my family differs alot frm before..
for eg i use to receive gifts but i haf now are juz monetary token..
not tat im complaining tho but it sumhow doesnt feels rite..
but anyway it's juz the tot tat counts rite?
dun mind wat i receive as long as the tot's there..

i want to get a miniature xmas tree to put in my rm..
i missed the process of decorating one...
of putting presents below the tree..
of anticipating xmas eve to open the presents..
or do i juz missed childhood...
sigh..
it all seems so long ago..

sumthing's been bugging me..
i tink my *ahem* noes...
the big two-O...
i dun wanna grow old..
growing old sux...
i dun get to be as carefree and innocent as b4...
i dun get to be troublefree as b4..
and as they say, time passes way faster when ur age doesnt consist of the "teen" anymore...
but it's part n parcel of growing up..
i cun be like peter pan..
he doesnt exists in the first place...

xmas, anybody care to haf a party?
-grin-

snow snow fall on me...

having to be in sch everyday frm 830-1700 is gonna kill me man..
anyway tat would give me more chances to update this blog rite?
like now~
=)

saturday was a brilliant day for me~
though i gotta go back to sch till 1,
but sumone made it one hell of a better day..
hor?
=)
the sound of her voice make the whole day worth while for me to look forward to..
hehe~
no matter how dreadful it's gonna be..
-grin-

sunday was a fun day~
haha~
went to snow city..
though not the actual plan but it's still fun nonetheless...
wanted to ice skate at jurong but there was some event held there..
so changed plans to snow city...
im gonna sound like a mountain turtle but tat was the first time i saw snow~
really really fun..
though it's artificial snow, enjoyed it nonetheless..
cos of the person im wif..
hehe~
anyway it wasnt as fantastic as i expected..
quite a small place...
but it was cold..
for my standards..
-7 degrees...
my whole face went numb..
couldnt speak properly..
=X

anyway i gotta go back to slacking in class..
and another half an hr more to go off~
=)