worries...

pple everywhere here are getting sceptical and afraid over the SARS issue...
not that im one of them, but im kinda the victim~
=P

during my lab lesson today, i happened to haf a headache and a slight fever(or so they say)...
my classmate beside me went "eh jeryd, u better go home.. dun pass it to me"...
i went blank~
partly due cos i juz got up frm my nap (hehe~) but mostly cos im not even infected wif the virus, juz some common ailments of a normal human being and im being ostracized here...
i would never do that to a fren or anybody...
maybe take precautions if he/she had the virus but not ostracize...
it's this time when that particular person needs support the most..
and pple arnd juz shun away...
-shakes head-
and they say we're the educated bunch~
yah educated, wif no morals~
Disclaimer: this is in no reference to anybody but juz some tots and views on my part alone..
in other words, dun tink too much~~ =)

at the dinner table, had a talk abt this issue wif my parents...
my dad was saying he pitied the family of the chinese doctor whom supposedly was the source of the virus..
he was saying that he may not be the source, he's juz the person who found out abt the virus in him first and made it public to warn the rest..
and bcos of this, his family was threatened, scolded at and looked down upon by pple..
it's times like this when i feel like going back to the kampung era where everybody is for everybody, not for themselves...
and we went on toking abt y malaysia never reported on any cases of the virus over at their end...
and my dad said tat they're another china, dun wanna admit tat they haf it to spoil their tourism business and pple coming into msia for various reasons...
i had to add this in, wat fin said to me this morn, mahatir to dumb to even noe tat it's in their country~~
(no offence to any malaysians out there)
:P

sumone knocked some sense into me last nite...
haven been toking to her for some time and here she comes and gave me some crucial advice to lemme carry on...
we started off by her asking me y dun i haf a gf...
and den i told her the story which she "begged" me to tell her~
after the story telling session, she went on to gimme those precious words...
she said that for me to actually move on and pick up those broken pieces,
i gotta start to forgive tat particular person for any wrongdoing i tot she had done to me...
i went to tink abt it..
i may haf forgotten her(more or less) but i never actually got over the fact y it all boils down to this situation...
can say tat im still kinda sour over it...
shall heed her advice and see how ti goes..
if tats the only way im gonna get on wif it and not tinking of "her" ANYMORE~
:)

could i get any more shag??

one thing i hate more than raining in yishun while climbing,
is the things i gotta do before the rain stops...
=P
u guys shld get wat i mean...
as usual, when there's rain at yishun, we'll head down to the shelter n began out routine..
led by our dear finfin~
n tats when hell rises over~~
haha!!
like wat we said today, "i'll live longer contracting SARS than undergoing fin's routine~"
how true can it get??
we started everything wif dead hangs and campuses..
den moved on to pullups..
mind u it aint normal pullups...
imagine doing 1-10 sets and back down...
woohoo~~
killer man..
=P
but one thing's for sure, this routine, this training is damn gd to to build urself up..
thnx fin~
take it sincerely n sarcastically~
hahaha~~

went on to meet up wif this bunch of riders frm a biking forum..
all of us rode cruisers and imagine 7 bikes on the road riding together~~
INTIMIDATING~~
:P
they were a bunch of guys way older than me..
frm a guy wif hair longer and bald spot wider than my dad's, to a 3rd yr poly student...
had a fun time wif them..
rode frm adam rd food center to mt faber to a seafood restaurant facing sentosa...
way cool dude~
=)
sure to go on longer overseas trip wif them..
but one thing, not only im the youngest there, im also riding the smallest bike..
=P
sianz..
all of them are riding bikes 400cc and above...
my wife's only a 150cc~
hehe~
but the time will come when im riding one of those~
keke~

the dreaded...

on everyone's lips today was SARS...
everywhere u go, u cld hear pple toking abt SARS...
frm how it came by to y arent our sch closed bcos of SARS...
even the four musketeers were making jokes out of the dreaded SARS...

noticed the over-used of the dreaded word?
=P
war btw america and iraq are pushed back to the back of our heads bcos of it...
ive been tinking, wat is of higher importance, SARS or war?
to me, i still cun sought the answer out...
SARS is closer to home but war is of global affairs, everything would be affected in one way or another...
especially price of fuel~
hehe~ :P

maybe i dun feel SARS is as impt cos i dun haf anyone i noe infected wif it yet...
tats always the case for humans...
when u lose it den u want it even more so when u can haf it...

one thing i dun understand is that y are polytechnic's students making a big fuss over the non-closure of the sch...
alhtough i dun agree to the statement the authorities issued over this...
they said " the students in our post-secondary institutions are older and are better able to understand the situation and take the necessary precautions."
but dun they realise that jc students are of the same age grp as polytechnics??
tats for them to go tink abt...

all i hope now is for the god above to resolve all this differences in the war, and to get rid of this worldwide epidemic tat's spreading all over the place...
Peace out~
=)

sorry seems to be the hardest word...

hung out wif jappo n lioness again today after the climbing session...
lioness INSIST of me changing her nick to sumthing nice..
i guess i got to since she was so damn freaking nice to me and i was damn freaking bad to her...
=)
so upon request and self realization on my part, lioness shall be known as gdl frm now on...
wat's gdl??
it's gentle-demure-lady~~
gd enuff??
hehe~
=P
anyway gdl, sorry for all the bad things i said today to ya..
wanted to test to see how long u can withstand b4 u retaliate~
=P
sorry~~
izzit accepted??
:)


sorry seems to be the hardest word,
forgetting seems the hardest thing to do...
trying to forget, but my memory wun erase,
watever we did n went thru...
without you my life seems so dark n blue...
without you i dunno where to go nor wat to do...
so pls darling, come back to where u belong..
me and you...


sudden poetic mood came into me and hence the above..
it may not be the best but at least i tried~
=P
doesnt mean anything though..
juz some inspiration coming frm everywhere...
im weird..
i admit~
=)

absurd!!!!

i find that my sch's management board is the most absurd one anybody can find in this world~~
izzit a bloody crime to freaking park my bike sumwhere convienient for me to access???
f**k u guys man~
the story goes this way...

i parked my bike in the staff corner, where everybody else did the same...
den my fren called in btw my class n said my bike was clamed..
i rushed down frm class n indeed it was..
went to 2 diff places to get it unclamed and made tons of noises...
now here comes the big drama...
went to this "estate management" office to get the key to unlock the bicycle chain..
yeah, it was a bicycle chain they used to lock my bike...
den this fat dude came out frm the rm..
i showed him the piece of paper, he slammed the door on me n went in to get the key...
i took the key n went off..
i went back to the office n guessed wat??
that bloody arse told his superior i used the f**k word on him..
all u cld rem was mumbling how stupid this whole process was...
n of course they interogate me..
i denied all claims n asked wat made him say that..
they couldnt further explain their claims n made me sign this piece of "counselling" form...
the best was their parting shot..
"dun worry, the director would deal wif u.."
all this while that fat arse was staring down at me..
so i replied, "sure y not? pls ask ur guy over there not to stare at me cos im like soooooo scared~"
den walked off...
i was damn freaking pissed the enitire day over this affair...
wat a buncha SUCKAS~~

below are some quizzes done recently...
kinda weird...
cos it was kinda true~~
=P


pure

What's YOUR sexual fetish?
brought to you by Quizilla

ok... i admit i admit..
i am still a virgin~
but wats there to be ashame abt??
i like being pure though~
hehe~
=)



You have a mysterious kiss. Your partner never
knows what you're going to come up with next;
this creates great excitement and arousal never
knowing what to expect. And it's sure to end
in a kiss as great as your mystery.

What kind of kiss are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

this is kinda true...
i always do unexpecting things to girls i like...
n of course my previous gfs...
im still single and very available...
so if any girls out there hu're interested in a guy like me can juz pop me a msg~
haha~
oh btw, i was voted as CLEO's most eligible bachelor~
hahahah~
:D

im tinking sumthing..
bad things always happens three times...
in the past 2 days, ive had brushes wif the "authorities" twice already...
would there be a third??
im highly anticipating it~
=P
not that i want to haf a brush against the law or any other authorities but it's juz that i wonder wat other things can this hell hole of a life of mine can throw at me...
i've lost that midas touch of mine...
i hope i gain it back soon..
sigh~

nuting..

nuting much to say nor happened to me that i wanna post..
juz random tots...

went to work today..
wif nuting but 4 slices of bread...
these 4 slices gonna last me the entire day..
as my frens would noe, it didnt lasted me...
=)
bought combos frm my own shop~
complete waste of money~~
=P

there was this bunch of monkey hanging outside the shop..
they wanted to get in n kept scratching the glass door..
i stared at them, they stared back..
i gave them the middle finger, expecting them to follow(haha) but they din..
in the end, they licked the door instead~
haha~
it's damn funny~~
looking at them licking the door like a popsicle..
:D

went home n wanted to catch a movie..
double clicked "about schmidt"..
played the movie for 10 minutes n it was stucked..
nvm...
moved on to "two weeks notice"..
couldnt even start...
=\
put in a disc and clicked on "memento"..
everything went well for the first part..
till i clicked on part 2...
it couldnt be watched...
ARGH~~
in the end, transformers saved the day..
caught an episode of the old series...
hey, at least i caught sumthing rite??
=P

not been tinking abt "gers" recently..
on one hand i feel free of any obligations, burdens, troubles..
but on the other, i feel lonliness n emptiness...
shld i go on my hunt?
or shld i wait for the bus to arrive?
"u" tell me...
can the light be shown to me...
pretty pretty pretty plssssss~~~

life....

my life nowadays is kinda like ur heartbeat when ya dead....
get wat i mean??
=)
i haf practically no life nowadays..
no one wanna go out nor hang out...
for goodness sake it's the wkend~~
sigh~

so poor old me spent the wkend working den went home...
f**king pathetic...
i feel so dull..
like some bookworm wif no life~
i wanna hang out~
i wanna do sumthing rather than go home n rot~~
sigh~~

work was bored..
time passed freaking slow today..
dunno y...
nuting much to do..
brought the bk i borrowed frm lioness there..
read the first chapter n gave it up..
it's even worse than my work place itself~~
=P

caught gangs of new york on my comp..
hehe~
it was a gruesome yet intriguing show..
i never left my seat thruout...
i like the racism n gangs storyline..
the way the fought were "caveman" like..
wif clobs and axes...
but u cun blame them, it was set in the 1800s...
but overall i give it 4 popcorns out of 5...
=)

i NEED a gf...
everybody has the company of their respective gfs for the wkend~~
"they" said tat u dun need a gf to haf company, there're frens...
where are they now????
come out come out wherever u are???
:p
juz receive another news frm the nut saying that she dun wanna catch a movie tmr..
tat means another lifeless, dull, pathetic day to go..
it SUCKS~~
sigh~
life sux anyway...

random stuff~

	Cheer Bear You're the Care Bear cheerleader! Your spunky personality and optimisim lifts everyone's spirit. Though you want everyone to be happy, you stand your ground on issues you feel strongly about and this can bring disunity among your friends. Despite this, you are a true believer in working together.
Take the Which Care Bear Are You? Quiz!

which bear are u??
apparently im the pink one~
haha
but i love the cartoon~
not to mention the smurfs, transformers, he-man and all the cartoons of my time~
i seemed so old~
cos wat kids are watching these days are like pokemon n digimon~
we dun haf those in my time~
=)

decision...

juz came back frm a climbing session at yishun..
shagged out frm it..
climbed alot today...
frm routes on walls to bouldering routes..
they came out a new system of routes on the 30m wall...
wif diff color routes rated diff frm 6A to 6C+...
wif corny names as well, frm Coca-Cola, Bullseye to MOzart~~
??????
=P
weird names for weird routes...

skipped a redundant n useless lesson today..
or shld i said i played truant..
=P
really useless waste of time..
wonder y they put it in the first place..
they expect us to turn up in class, read thru some online tutorials n do out assignments..
i can do it better at home..
:p

jappo owe me a treat, a meal or a movie preferably..
=)
went down all the way to city hall juz to get a set of keys for him..
where can u find such a gd fren(ME!!) anywhere~~
=P

as u noe we went down to safra...
they offered us jobs..
$7/hr...
attractive salary~
but the job specs aint that impressive though..
kinda stoning job...
been tinking, shld i quit my current job n take up tat job..
or shld i juz stick wif it..
dillema~~
my current job pays only $5/hr but there's incentives in buying their products...
but the $7/hr really ringing in my head~
hehe~
wat shld i do??

$$$money$$$

had a really really short day in sch today..
2 hrs for 2 diff lecture...
end of the day~
haha..

went on down to the mechanic to get my wife done..
was told that bcos of the 2T oil, carbon is clogged up in the ignition valves that causes the beep noise when the ignition is on...
this also caused the piston to get burnt..
bet ya that 90% of those reading this dun understand~
haha
but tats y im posting it, the thrill in knowinu guys dun understand~
hehe~ =P
but bottom line is that i gotta spent $200 on the repairs...
sigh~
left "her" there for the entire day and collected it in the evening...
was told even worst news..
the sprocket n the chain gotta change soon cos it's blunt and cun rotate the chain properly..
sigh~
MORE money spent...the next time round though~

after all the money ordeal, went to meet lioness n jappo at meridian for a "conveyor" sushi dinner..
it was alrite but not fantastic..
spent $15 on the meal..
kinda steep but expected it..
the table beside us was a bunch of kids eating it for the first time..
they made lots of noise and din noe how to go abt having it...
there was this gal hu doesnt eat sushi n gave a bloody wrinkled n frown face thruout..
if my dad saw it, he'll say "look at that face, how to touch 4D??"
haha~
tat explains it... =)

borrowed a book frm lioness...
"The hand i fan with" by Tina McElroy Ansa..
haven started reading it but the sypnosis' quite intriguing..
we shall see~
=P

Au Revoir~

juz another day..

juz another day in the life of mine...
climbing session in the morning was gd..
well worked out...
but realised tat i cun over exert myself..
all my old injuries are recurring again..
in addition to a new one..
sore shoulder..
my wrist is working up again..
cun put all weight on it..
fingers arent in the best condition either..
aching fingers after climbing...
oh, by the way, all the injuries are coincidentally on the rite side~
injury prone i guess~
=P

went back to sch for a specialization talk for year 3...
after the whole damn speech, i feel tat i shldnt be in this course in the first place..
im not interested in anything they're offering..
how can i survive wif doing sumthing im not interested in..
im in deep shit, i tell u....
but i guess i'll juz pull thru all this wif the diploma...
shouldnt waste the money n time i've already spent here...
but the bottomline is, will i survive after this ordeal??

had a gd laffing time during the short meeting wif jappo n ms dixie normous(dixie)...
thruout the whole meeting, we were laffing out ass off wif puns directed at ms normous...
and oh, we were monitoring the activities going on in the cheerleaders club room..
which is rite next to ours...
here are the activities which occured...
both male n female cheerleaders changed in the room in the presence of each other...
(hm... tot there's toilets for both genders juz down the pathway?? =P)
the female cheerleaders are bimbos n sluts wif figure to die for...
(din we noe that already.. hehe)
there were some banging noises in the room..
wonder wat "banging" were they doing??
haha~
=D

my wife's giving me lots of problems recently...
frm the lack of 2T oil to the recent problem of having a beeping sound..
my dad went to enquire abt it n found out it's cos of the ignition valve getting stalled cos of oil clogging it up..
gotta bring "her" to the "clinic" for the "doc" to strip her down n inspect it...
damn~
money spent again..
but i guess it's part n parcel of owning her, my childhood dream...
=)

found sumthing interesting in an email sent by a pri sch classmate..
it asked u to choose a choc filling which u prefer...
i chose peppermint n here is the review

Peppermint
All things are possible to peppermint lovers; you have all the scope of life
to choose from. You tend to see life as moving on - tomorrow is another day.
You're very clear on what you're doing, whether it be in matters of the
heart of in your profession. You're full of ideas and won't be bound by
rules unless you've made them. You're always striving for things to be
better, looking ahead with an open mind.
Excess: The need for all the above. Being able to let go and trust your
inner center. Suffering from the past is clouding your judgment of the here and now.

the weird part is that it's kinda true..
freaky~
how can such quiz actually tell how a person u are when the analyst or the person hu wrote this never met u b4??
a question to ponder~
ciao for now~
=)

sabotage~

life is boring wif sch back on...
nuting's much been going on..
i can narrate the happenings of the day in like a short paragraph~
=P
so here it goes..

sick shaunie came into the lecture theater looking more or less dead~
:P
he was slping most of the time..
hope he'll get better~
dun want him to pass it arnd to us~
haha.. juz kidding~
=)
was walking to the library wif finfin....
we were walking behind a ger wif nice flowing hair..
so i made a comment, "tat ger has nice hair"
den, fin went on saying "oh u mean that ger in front is pretty~~"
at which pt she turned over n looked at us wif me, mouth wide open staring hard at fin...
i was dumb strucked...
but the best wasnt yet to come...
she turned back n walked in a stance as though she's really tat damn pretty n everyone's looking at her...
i was laffing my ass off den...
haha
cos firstly, she aint pretty...
n secondly, no one's looking at her~~
haha, but it was a joke well pulled~
fin, ur turn would come~

nuting much happened for the rest of the day...
nuting interesting...
but.......
i pulled redsky's leg juz now~~
haha
it'll be a joke btw us, shan't gonna publish it here~
haha
got ya din i??
=)

reflections..

back to normal sch life..
cun get used to it..
cun wake up~~
too used to slping late till i overslept this morn...
luckily i ride~ hehe~

everytime during makchik's lesson, everyone in class wanna convulse n die..
she's the most long-winded person we've ever met..
she can repeat a single thing over n over again...
n she's one of the worst teacher i'ver ever encountered..
by far the worst on the list~
sigh~
wat did we do to deserve her man~
damn stress today during her lesson..
need to hand up half the prog we need to code out...
by THIS wk~
and btw, she aint aiding in anyways at all~

i look at myself in the mirror..
often wondering who am i...
am i juz a piece of meat wif a name?
y do i look like this??
weird questions juz pops out~
maybe im juz weird..
yah i guess it's the latter~
=P
better get more slp..



message to moi: i never stopped being ur fren.. i never disappeared.. im always here for ya... i was rite here waiting for a reply frm u... cos im baffled.. care to enlighten me? =)

day of memories...

had brunch wif parents b4 heading down to UWC to support my 2 buddies in action~
b4 i could even step into the sports hall, 3 gals approach me at the entrance to sell me drinks..
i refused at first cos i wasnt thristy in the first place..
but there's this particular gal who is so pretty, i was tranced into agreeing to purchase a bottle of mineral water...=)
she kept persisting in the sweetest voice n smile, i melted rite in front of the entrance... =P
kept a close eye on her thru out the day in the sports hall..
zooming in on her whenever she enter the hall..
haha~ some vouyeurism~~
but u cun blame me, my pal zero was there keeping an eye on her as well..
haha~
anyway, the comp was a tuff one...
real tuff~
tried the routes out myself at the end of the comp..
the route setter is out to kill, i tell u...
haha~
by the way, GOOD JOB shaunie n fin~
u guys did great~ so proud i noe u guys~ haha~~
congrats to shaunie on getting his first medal~
=)

supposedly catching a show wif jappo n lioness after the UWX thingy..
but we couldnt decide on wat movie to watch...
in the end, we wandered arnd like lost souls and ended up sipping coffee at coffee club xpress in kinokuniya...
jappo wanted to shoot some japanese...
lioness toked crap..
n i juz stoned away.. occasional crap of course~ :p
wat a way to spend the nite eh~
haha

saw my ex-crush while stoning outside heeren today..
apparently wif a BUTCH in hand.. YUCKS~~~~~
but anyway we played a prank on her...
msged her to confirm whether we saw the rite person..
indeed it was..
so i sarcastically asked if tat was her "bf" n she replied yes..
the next msg was "quite yandao ah".. hahhaha~~
damn~ hope she got the pun~~
anyway lied to her i was wif my gf juz in jest n encouragement by jappo...

memories start to float arnd in my mind thruout the nite...
gd memories...
bad memories...
memories of "her" floated arnd as well..
especially when lioness kept mentioning the show marrying the mafia..
tat was our first movie date..
the one which i felt an electricity going on btw us..
every single moment of that nite flashed thru my mind...
everything she said...
how queer a person's memory that he could rem everything he wants to...
another incident of us flashed thru when i was sipping coffee..
it was the same coffee i ordered for her on our first date..
our conversations..
getting to noe each other..
starting to fall for her...
but all that turn to naught.. zilch~
y did it ever turn out tat way i dunno..
it baffles me..
trying to move on but apparently i cun..
how long would i take to get it over??

faces of pple...
Sat, 150303, post...

went to work today...
work as a coupon distributor~
all the shitty jobs muz be given to me..
sigh~~
stood leaning on a fire hydrant, in the sun for 3 hrs..
the whole process of handing out the coupons made me realise the faces of humans...
1) the friendly-smiling-accepting type: these type are those which i love to encounter.. especially if they're pretty as well... yep there was some pretty ones in this category when they smile n accept the coupon.. =)

2)the dun-pass-me-anthrax type: these type are those i wanna shove all the coupons in their mouth~ they give the hoaty look n the sort of "u're filthy" look at ya... and basically juz walk past ya wif the dragging stare... SUCKAS~~~

3)the giggly-figgly-smily type: these normally consist of gers, young, mostly malays(no racism intended)... they'll accept the coupons but w/o some giggles n a cheeky smile at ya at which pt i'll smile back n say thnx which would receive more giggles frm them.. haha~

4)the wif-bf-but-i-still-wanna-look-at-u type: these are gers who are wif their bf but when would always look at me, give a sweet smile, of course i smiled back, n walk off cos the bf is pulling away... usually, the bf looks like erm... shit?? haha~

5)the gays: nuff' said... gives me the creeps~~ when they smiled at me and mouthed "no thank u"... yyeeewwwwwwwwww~~~~~~ disgusted i tell u~~

after work, had a walk round orchard by myself..
not bad though...
went to the library, borrowed more bks..
n most imptly, i finally finished the japanese police shooting game after spending $1.50..
haha

ive always find that family bowl is the most fun time i haf wif my parents..
we'll juz bowl n fool arnd wif each other..
no arguments...
no tiffs...
juz plain old fun..
tats y im always looking forward to it~
=)

a rather long entry... for once...

started the day wif my final paper of the wk~
YES!!
=P
but the setter of the paper apparently tink tat we haf some kinda comp processing unit in us...
he expect us to finish 4 long, very long questions in an hr n a half..
but luckily i could finish it..
wif like 5 mins left~~
but nvm, it's OVER~~~

went climbing after tat..
kinda shag...
frm the heat n the routes given by power chua~~
i tink i strained my wrist n shoulder..
they're aching~
no comps n training ahead... so i can rest~~
=)

caught cradle 2 the grave wif guys together wif pea, nut(infamous eunice) and glenny(duh)~
action packed movie wif a typical storyline...
jet li rulez~
no one can move a fast as he could..
and the "campusing" scene in the beginning, is unbelievable~
hu can ever do tat..
not even alain robert(the french spiderman)~
:P madness man...

now on to serious stuff...
i find that im too nice a guy...
too damn very nice~
to gers that is..
im sensitive towards them..
do anything for them..
but never once was my feelings reciprocated..
im always the "gd" fren to them..
y???
y is the lousiest scum of the earth attached to a beautiful nice young lady while a nice young man like me is left on the shelf??
tis the question of the moment...
i can only be the fren hu's always there for them..
the shoulder to cry on but never one to lean on...
i always ask wat did i do wrong or wat i din do??
but no matter how i tink of it, the question cun be answered..
cos ive done nuting wrong n ive done kinda everything~
my current status, low on confidence n in morale..
kinda despair even... darent take the step forward anymore...
i shld juz write on my forehead, "Bachelor for life, god decreeds"
cos if things carry on this way, it'll come true...
how long haf i been alone, hm.... 2 n half yrs..
tat's a long time..
it's the time all guys gotta spend in the army..
imagine that~
i'll anticipate consolations like the right one aint here yet...
true, but when will it come..
now would be the rite time..
im feeling my all time low~
bruised n battered...
when would the nurse come n heal me??

oh yah, DISCLAIMER: the above tots n feelings is not directed to any particular person or event.. juz some tots that i encounter recently...

another boring day...

i need a life~~~
haha~
serious man, it's boring me~
other than the tests, there aint nuting much to occupy the day...

i tink i haf the cutest lil cousin~~
she's so cute when she calls me "kor kor"..
so sweet~~
n especially when she asks me to don the winnie the pooh puppet to play wif her..
she'll tug at my shorts n call out winnie the pooh in baby language~
hehe~ =)
u cun refuse such a cute face can u?
tats y i pamper her alot...
but tat would always receive scolding frm my grandma..
=\

tmr's the last paper~ YEAH!!
finally...
kinda tedious to go thru a wk of tests~
=P

sigh~
the guys are in the UWC comp while im left to tink wat shld i do to occupy my day...
i cun join~
stupid under-18 rule...
makes no diff~
when power chua is joining~
haha
even though he's "under-18", he's as strong as the real mcCoy...
hehehe~

for my parting shot, u guys been hinting for the past few days, n yes i received it..
thnx~
i will stop speeding..
anyway i din sped for the past few days..
find tat slow drivers dun irritate me as much as i speed..
cos im as slow as them??
haha
but i get ur msg jappo~~
=)

ciao~

juz a normal day...

i wonder y my days are so ordinary recently...
it's so dull tat it sux~~
naps fill the day up...

went home relatively early..
almost rite after my morn paper...
told myself that if the sun is still shining brighly down, i'll wash my wife..
tat promise was made half heartedly(haha) but since i've made it, i'll do it..
=P

took me an hr or so to make my wife squeaky clean~
hands turned black cos of the grease n oil...
but satisfaction was there...
seeing my wife parked there under the tree, the shiniest bike among the rest..
aw~~~ wat a touching moment~ haha~~
=)

juz finished studying...
kinda confident over tmr's paper..
we shall see when tmr arrives..
:p

im currently crazy over steph song~
btw, she's an actress...
a damn pretty one as well~
i juz love her american accent~
hahaha!!
but she's damn attractive~
drools~~

i tink im missing sumthing in my life..
sumthing in me...
i tink the thing starts wif "L"...
feeling all alone..
abandoned n alone...
sigh~~
when will "U" send it to me..
especially since "U" gave it to almost everyone arnd me...
im waiting~~

QUOTE of the WEEK~~~
this is the quote of the wk..
a new segment proudly brought to u by #fx~

in irc
Arc`teryx: "humpf!"

Arc`teryx aka Jappo~
haha

cloud of doubt...

everything was fine for most of the day..
today's paper was not as bad as yest..
at least i noe how to work out one question..
=P

went on down to the "mall" wif shaunie n jappo...
wanted to print a poster...
apparently the four musketeers had a fight over the lousy poster~
haha~ :D

my nap was supposedly a break frm the hectic day in which i would resume the damned studies..
but woke up wif a headache instead..
muz be cos i slept wif wet hair.. my grandma's explanation~
haha~

was doing my workout juz now...
increased all weights~
apparently i tink too highly of myself..
was doing bench press n juz increased it by 10kg..
during my last set, i couldnt do the last 2 "pushes" and it actually fell on top of me n i couldnt move!!
haha~
dropped the whole bar sideways n got up to catch my breath...
was tinking wat if i couldnt even drop it to the side..
=P

went to "her" blog...
tats when the cloud set down on me...
her blog seems so cheerful..
it seems like she's enjoying herself while im here still trying to get over her..
im struggling, i muz say..
it's weird...
it aint the first time but it's painful~
very painful... to noe our contrasting lives...

for now, i gotta concentrate on books..
and hope tat i dun go tink of her...
it sux, it really does...
forget it...

fail...

today's test is a sure failure..
half the paper i was writing crap..
really had no freaking idea..
damn..
couldnt study much either...
head "spinning" too much..
tat's juz life i guess..
things happened at the wrong time..

am taking a short break to write this post while studying for tmr's paper..
slightly more confident over tmr's paper..
cos at least i noe wat's going on..
let's hope everything runs smoothly~

tink there was some band event going on at my sch..
saw those sax lying arnd..
damn!
i want one~
haha
if only it's cheaper or if only i could find a 2nd hand one..
i'lll definately buy it..
:)

i find that my winamp is like my feelings..
it's playing songs which depicts my current situation n feelings..
for example my tots towards "her" and the situation im wif "her"..
sigh~
dun tink abt it!!!
=P

ok, tats abt it for today..
gotta go back burying my head in the books..
to quote sumone, Au Revoir~

090303, Sunday's post
one sick day...

this is the 2nd time im writing this post..
apparently the server went down~

had an acute pain in my tummy since last nite...
tot tat a gd nite slp would do it but instead the pain fail to cease the next morn..
sigh~
pulled myself all the way down to TP...
the pain's still there...
climbed thru the pain..

the route was alrite except tat it's more on the technical side...
would be really disappointed if i dun make it to the finals but i kinda noe that i wun~
=P
but all of us fall at the same spot..
so that would mean all 4 of us would get into the finals~
hehe~
tat would be gd~

went home n took a nap..
got up n realised i was having a fever..
a kinda high one too...
ate 2 panadol n went ahead to study..
but apparently nuting gets in...
head too groggy to input anything in n remembering it..
let's hope n pray i can do the paper tmr..
common tests suck big time..
=P

i dislike being kept in the dark over stuff which i tink i need to noe..
it makes me feel really uneasy..
wun reveal hu's doing this to me but i hope he/she would juz tell me watever it is..
it makes me lose trust in him/her...
n i dun want to~

caught up wif this fren of mine..
nice talking to her again..
hope to see her real soon..
been ages since i last set my eyes on her~
=)
u noe hu u are~

leaving u guys wif a parting shot, thnx to all wif their advices n support~
-sniff- -sniff- i dunno wat im gonna do w/o u guys~ haha~
oh btw, i'll still speed but i'll be really careful over it~
=)

rainy days~

damn do i hate the rain~
went off to meet my frens at the army market in the noon..
sky was dark but not raining..
so mounted on my wife, and set off..
guess wat? rain poured barely 10mins into my journey..
and mind u it aint a drizzle~~
reached the market drenched to the skin..
sigh~
no choice but to get a totally new set of clothes at the market..
spent $36 on a tee n a berms..
not really ex but still it's money tat aint supposed to be spent..
but i gotta say, i kinda like the tee~~ at a bargain of $8!!

my best fren called and asked me out for supper..
he said he wanted to fully utilise his wkend out since the rest of his wk is spent in camp~
went to his place, picked him up and went down to a 24 hr roti prata stall...
the prata suck~ so does the curry~~
they used to make them better before..
watever happened, i dunno man...
but anyway heard tons of army stories frm him..
kinda funny though..
on the other hand, i got an urge to go n try it out..
weird since i've always tot NS was a waste of time...
but anyway it's a sooner or later thing...
we'll see when im all bald n suffering in there..
:)

had a very nice talk last nite with "kowaii"...
felt real good that i meant sumthing dear to her...
at long last sumone has use of me.. in a gd way...
at least i felt needed...
if ya reading this, thnx for putting me in such a position..
u shld noe ur position in mine~ =)

oh yah, i went speeding again juz now...
felt really really really gd~~
the adrenaline rush is way better than being high on ecstacy~
although i haven felt the latter yet~
:)
but at least i tot things out clear...
not that troubled over that thing already...
guess i gotta let it go n juz see how things go..

tmr would be rockamania, a climbing comp...
at a wrong time~
common tests next wk!!
but im not giving myself much hope...
dunno y, juz got a feeling that i wun qualify yet again..
but all the best to the rest~
my hopes are all on u guys~
=)

an uneventful day...

the day's uneventful for me..
nuting much for me to post.. :)
finally managed to finish watching the sixth sense..
i gotta admit, this is only the 2nd such movie to scare the hell outta me..
the first one is, of course, the ring...
got a shock at the scene where the dead puking girl found cole in his "shelter"...

juz finished watching "the singapore short stories project" on arts central..
gotta say it's an intriguing show... one of the better locally produced program...
could actually relate to the show... apparently relating to it in a sad way~
a female character from one of the story really reminds me of "her"...
even the actress resembles her.. and i dunno wat kind of uncanny similarity is this but even their names are the same...
tried not to tink of her but the show brought it back to me..
am trying real hard to maintain on the hope while in the meantime giving her time..
hope it succeeds...
but wat i wanna say to her is that no matter wat it is, i'll always be here for her... :)

parting shot: i realised that speeding while riding really helps to clear my mind.. i noe that it's dangerous and all but it really, indeed help me to tink better... shld do it more often~ hehe~ :p

things that goes in my mind....

i hate to say this but im a thinker~
i tink alot... but in the wrong areas...
been troubled over ger issues lately..
at a wrong time too...
it's been bothering me the whole nite..
wats wrong wif me?
am i too ugly? too possesive? too deep for comfort? too nice??
question n more questions start to float arnd in my mind..
i feel helpless at times.. and times are occuring way too often...
i am lost.. i need a light to guide me thru this thick n dense forest..
everyday, a mask is worn to face the "audience"..
hiding all the troubles in my heart.
y?? cos i noe that would dampened the whole spirit of everybody...
but tats another case for another time..
the thing that i dislike had happened..

can say that im devastated..
but i dunno..
somehow im holding on to a glimmer of hope...
a feint glimmer...

i hope "u" are reading this..
u mean sumthing to me n i hope i am to u...
i dunno wat i did that made u reacted that way...
i hope all these can be cleared...
i really do...
anyway the thing that died was a flower...
but i guessed it doesnt matter now, does it?

reply to "complains"

after hearing so many complains by pple who had visited this place,
i've decided to clarify the whole thing..
they complained i used nicks and not their real name,
so i guess in this post, would be the unveiling of their real identities~
:)

finfin        = weeli, aka power chua, weeli sharma,
                   doublefin, momofinfin, jpfin......... =P
shaunie    = shaun, the daniel chan lookalike~
jappo       = japheth, or the white chicken...=)
pea          = rachel, fin's gf
lioness     = jasmin, shaun's beloved cuz
judo chick = charis, shaun's gf

tats the brief intro for now...
when there's more nicks for pple, i'll update it again..
in case more pple complains~
hehe~

a post of boredom~

haven heard frm her the entire day...
actually not entire but half cos it's only 2 now..
but still tinking of her...

@ fin's place now...
supposedly studying~
haha
but lets see how much we can cover today...
:)

went to service bike b4 that n pais 50 bucks for engine oil n brke pads..
found out some dents arnd the engine area cos of a recent accident...
heart very pain..
it's like seeing my wife getting injured...
sigh~
also realised that i haf anothe 11 gruesome months more to pay off my bike~
money money money money money money~~
cun we live w/o it??

wat a day~
a busy day i haf to say..
after a late nite yest... =P
anyway went to climb in the morn at bukit merah..
had a fun time~ not exactly tired but fun..
we had our inaugural Get Sick competition there..
participants were me, shaunie, jappo, fin n nizam...
haha.. actually it was "organised" by us...
we each set routes on diff walls n implement competition routes n see who got the most pts..
as usual, i wasnt in the top 3..
but we had fun...
no one completed my route which was a killer at the finishing pt~
hehe~ am i gd or wat~
:)

went to study after the climb.. managed to pull jappo along..
a gr8 achievement by him to study wif us in the grp~
haha...

after a brief study session, on to meet th gers..
lioness, pea n judo chick was meeting us in orchard...
i felt like an extra..
all of them are coupled wif the other guys except me~
so ultimately im the odd one out~

to end this post, i wanna say thnx to the guys(fin, shaunie n jappo)
thnx for watever u guys said to me today..
appreciate it...
=)

random tots...(yest's post)
i tot life was gd to me at last...
i tot wrong~
it gave me sumthing so dear but took it away juz as fast...
not really took it away but leave me troubled over it..
cun "u" juz give it to me nice n sweet???
n not leave me here dangling...

for her: i juz wanna tell u this... u mean alot to me..
i accepted hu u are... i dun even care wat u did before~
cos i like u juz the way u are...
i'll juz wait for the right time... when u can finally accept me in ur life...
and i forbid u to look down on urself... look at the glass as half-full...
ok? =)

the wkend was a busy one for me..
with 2 competitions to attend to, i was dead shag after the supposedly relaxing wkend~
the first was a bouldering comp, boulderactive @ the youth park
din do really well...
way below expectation..
cldnt even qualify~
:(
but was happy for my mates, shaunie n fin..
they did qualify n fin managed to get 2nd~
hooray~
:)

the next one was on sunday.. rockeast, at ITE tampines...
was a speed comp for me..
expected alot frm the comp cos i really wanted to win sumthing..
win i did, a third prize in the speed team event..
but i wasnt happy.. i noe i din do well, i noe i suck..
dunno y, but kinda despair abt climbing in comps now..
feel that my jr is surpassing me..
sad sad sad sad sad

anyway below would be a pic of the 4 musketeers n the xtra zak~
=)

(frm left: jappo, zak wif cap, shaunie, me n finfin)

this is juz a blog for me n watever i need to pour out...
troubles always surrounds me...
sumtimes i asked myself y am i even alive in the first place...
my dad shld juz wear a condom~

anyway i feel that life has juz turn for the better for me...
this person came into my life n lit it up...
although i dun like her to lit "that thing" up but i accepted it for hu she is..
juz hope there would be a happy ending to this chapter not like the past...
:)